dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
