no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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