32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
