Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize