this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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