My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
