escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
