the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
