Don't you send me to vm
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
