I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
