Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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