The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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