He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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