Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
