I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
