I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize