so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize