he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
