he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
