I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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