i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We had sex on a dog bed..
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
