you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
