you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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