I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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