Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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