Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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