I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Come share oat with me in your robe
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
