ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Randomize
