physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
