I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
