it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
