The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I will pee on everything he values.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Randomize
