Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize