All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
