Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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