I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
