You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
