That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize