We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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