I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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