these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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