Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i will never coherently bang her
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
a search helicopter?!
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
