I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
