big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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