Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
