It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
