we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
