awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
