Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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