none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize